Fat

I am fat. Yes, I am. I accept this. But this is good, because I have crossed to the second stage of problem solving with myself. From denial to accepting.

I am planning to lose some weight over the next three months. I always knew till 1 year back that I can lose weight whenever I wanted to in around 15 days. I have done it a couple of times and thought I can do it again. But it’s getting increasingly difficult with every passing day of my life. I have gained so much weight in the past 1 year that it’s amazing. I have gone where I did not go before.

It’s actually difficult; you keep denying that you are not doing it because you don’t have the will to do it. You always blame the conditions, oh I am busy at office, my son does not let me sleep at night, I need eight hours of sleep, I do not want to spend money to join a gym and the moment I join, I will get thin. There are endless excuses. Every excuse you now is wrong but you are so convinced that you do not even realize that’s it’s just an excuse and argue that that’s the reason for your being fat.

I know people other than myself, who have lost weight. Like me, they have really worked hard to achieve this. Some of them woke up at 5 PM every morning just to jog when they have been facing some harsh working hours and what not throughout the day. A few told me they have joined Talwalkars and that they just go and sleep in the taxi after telling the address to the cab driver. I have seen people stop eating sweets and salt for a day completely.

If I am not getting time throughout the day, and have busy working hours, I can at least stop eating salt for a day. Just one day of the week??? I guess, I can, but I didn’t. I made a lot of mistakes and relied too much on excuses. I guess that has to change now. I am planning to get fit and this time “no excuses”.